Being happy and upbeat despite negative circumstances is not something that’s easy to wrap your head around.
Then again, if you really think about it, there are times when things are going really great for you, and you still can’t seem to remain happy about it for long. So, perhaps, happiness is a choice we make after all? Read on…
You’re heard it over and over again, that you can choose to still be unhappy or uptight when everything is going well for you and you can also choose to be happy even when nothing seems to be going right for you. Even Abraham Lincoln once said that most folks are about as happy as they make up their minds to be. If you’re one of the countless people who have no idea what this means, or doubt if this theory really adds up to anything, now’s the time to find out!
Ultimately, it has something to do with our overall attitude in life. We may not realise this, but most of us are used to being on ‘standby mode’ in anticipation of things going wrong in our lives, so much so that we expect bad things to happen to us. We also use up most of our thought power on excuses on why things went wrong for us, or, regretting our actions that led to unwanted circumstances. Think about it, if that’s how we live day to day, we’re not going to have much time for having fun and enjoying the good things in our lives. Speaking of which, let’s get to our first point.
How Familiar Are You With The Attitude Of Gratitude?
Feeling grateful is a gracious attitude to have for it shows that you acknowledge all the good things that take place in your life. If you put pen to paper, you’ll surely come up with at least a dozen things to be grateful for in your life! For instance, have you given thought that you woke up this morning when around the world, millions did have the opportunity to live another day?
Having an attitude of gratitude makes such a big difference in our lives and ultimately, our happiness as well. Try this: get a notebook and make that your Gratitude Notebook. Every single day, take some time out of your day (or night) and write down every single reason you can think of to be grateful for that day. It could be something big like a promotion, or something you personally feel is miniscule like being able to quench your thirst with a cool drink when it was such a hot day. Get the picture? Do this every day for a month, and chances are, each time you’re done with this daily note, you’ll feel so much better about your life.
Strive to make a difference in someone else’s life
In other words, make another person happy. If you yourself are not in such a great place right now, you’re probably wondering, “Wait a minute – I’m not doing too great myself, but I should go make someone else happy?” Yes, that’s exactly it! As the great Mark Twain once said: The best way to cheer yourself is to try to cheer somebody else up. The theory behind this is, as humans, you reap what you sow. If you sow happiness around, then it’s exactly what you will reap. This as apart from the resulting gratification, the joy of being able to make another person’s day and the pure satisfaction of knowing you are able to make a difference and someone else is smiling because of your actions! Somehow, you will feel a weight lifted off from you when you make others happy. As Mother Theresa was famously quoted: A life not lived for others is not a life; let no one ever come to you without leaving better and happier. And… no one can ever say that she was an unhappy individual!
Optimism Is A Factor Of True Happiness
We all have our ups and downs when it comes to dealing with changes in our lives as well as negative circumstances. No one can escape them, but we all have the power to understand that no matter what we’re feeling about a situation, that feeling will eventually pass and let you move on, if you let it! One way to let that happen is to have an optimistic attitude towards life. It’s also this optimism that will draw better things towards you and not let you wallow in sadness for too long. So, to start feeling truly happy and get things to turn around for you, do work on that one, especially if you know yourself to be a generally negative person with a glum outlook on life.
Share Your Feelings With Another Person
We get it, that there will be times when you feel so down that no comedy show on Netflix or expensive bar of chocolate can help lift your mood. When things seem that glum for you, the last thing you need is to keep thinking about your circumstances, especially if it seems to be a hopeless case in your perspective. Note, we mentioned your perspective. Yes, no matter how bad a situation may be, there’s always a silver lining. Not everyone is gifted to be able to see it, and that’s when friends, family, etc, come in. Ask yourself, who among your family and friends seem to have a knack of cheering you up? Chances are high, these are the very individuals who can help you see the bright side of things that are invisible to you at this moment. Be honest with them though, for it does little good to hide important facts from the people who are trying to help you. Let it all out, and hear what they have to say, with an open heart.
Smile, Even If You Don’t Feel Like Doing So
Ever heard of a resting bitch face? Well, a truly happy person, one who has mastered the art of happiness, does not have one. These people have a habit of smiling, even unconsciously. The act of smiling is a powerful tool that is underused the world over, except to gain more likes on IG. Smiling is an act, in which emotions will follow suit – but you’ll first have to make a habit of it. If you’re determined to be happy, apart from all the other tips in this article, do not leave this one out! Remember too, that your lovely smile costs nothing, impoverishes you in no way, but it somehow creates happiness to the person receiving it. Learn to plant a sincere, happy smile on your face and happiness will inevitably follow.
Move Around!
When you’re feeling blue, exercise! Walk, swim, hit the gym, anything will do, as long as you get up and start to move that body along. Scientists believe that 20 minutes of exercise can make you happy regardless of how sad you may be feeling at the time. How come? Well, exercise raises your heart rate and triggers a surge of hormonal changes in your body, releasing some much-needed ‘happiness’ hormones! Not only will you feel happier, but you’ll also come out stronger, with more will power and the ability to think clearly of your next move, as opposed to being sedentary and foggy-brained. So, exercise regularly, and you won’t even have time to feel blue!
Stop Trying To Impress Others
Many of us are guilty of placing too much importance on what others think of us – the clothes we wear, the salaries we make, the friends we keep, etc. Consequently, we live this tiring life of trying to keep up appearances that may not even be what we truly want in our lives, just to impress others. Do what you truly want in your life, and do it for yourself, not for the approval of friends, neighbours and relatives. True happiness is when you get to really be your own authentic self – in the way you like to dress, to the job you’d rather be doing, the people you want to hang out with, etc. If something in your life just doesn’t seem right, no matter what others are doing and saying around you, turn around and go in the direction that best suits your heart. Only then will happiness find its way into your life.
